I know that is only costs $49.00 a night to stay at your hotel but can I make a couple of suggestions:
1)You cannot call my room non smoking just cause I am not smoking in it. If the bag of dicks that stayed in the room before me smoked in it, guess what, it is now a smoking room. The spray you used might cover up some of the stench but you are not fooling me. Also, the fuzzy foreigners that spent 90% of their time smoking outside my room are not helping the smoky smell either.
2) When the person in the room above me flushes the toilet, it should not knock me out of bed. I bet you have some powerful plumbing but come on. It sounds like a space shuttle is taking off above me.
3) The shower nosel should be higher than my chest. Do you have a proliferation of midgets staying at your hotel? I should not have to be a gymnast to get the shampoo out of my hair.
4) Why not just have the tub made out of ice because that would be a whole lot less slippery than the material the bottom of the tub is made out of. Doing the splits every time I get in the shower really sucks.
5) pay the extra couple of cents and get at least one ply toilet paper.
6) When the vending machine spit out the water bottle it also spit out a fart. Might want to clean that bad boy out.
7) Ask whatever cab company you partner with to have at least a cab every twenty minutes stop by to pick people up.
8) Do your escalators ever work? It seems like one is also on the fritz and it always happens to be the one I am using.
9) It would be nice if your security "guards" were: a) younger than 70, b) spoke english, and c) knew that they were security guards.
10) It was a nice touch this year that I have a TV in my bathroom. The only problem was that someone obviously tried to steal it at some point and in doing so really jacked up the color and reception.
11) The room service line cannot always be busy.
12) When my down the hall neighbor throws up in their trash baskets and puts it in the hall, it should not take a day for someone to retrieve it. I have photo evidence of this.
13)When your ATM's only spit out $100 bills, your store should be able to break them or take them at all.
14) The first mardi gras elevator on the left is a fucking death trap and needs to be serviced. The sound it makes when the door closes scares the piss out of me. I always forget that it sucks and it too late once the door shuts.
15) Get a vacuum cleaner that is at least from the 80's. Something tells me it no longer sucks the right way when it is that old and by the looks of my rug, it needs to be retired. So does the cleaning lady. She has one foot in the coffin and the other on the tub floor.
Other than this, thanks for having such a cheap room rate. See you next year when you find a new way to make my conference interesting.
Salty
