Send in the Clowns

Was this woman singing the National Anthem or announcing the circus was in town?

KFC Dippers

This commercial is awful.  Four dudes go to some party and go straight to the KFC Dippers.  This is almost identical to the Taco Twelve Pack Taco Bell commercial.  If I go to a party and there is KFC there I know the host invited white trash.  In the commercial the four dildos leave the party because they ran out of Dippers.  If you leave a party because they run out of KFC then you need to A) go to a doctor and get your ticker checked and B) Throw yourself in front of a bus and save me the time of pushing you in front of said bus.  Come on KFC, this situation never happens.  It would be more believable if Big Foot rode though the living room on a unicorn.

Side note:  I love KFC biscuits.  I think they put black tar heroin in those bad boys because I cannot eat just one.

Bumper Stickers

The number of bumper stickers you have on your car directly correlates with how insane you are.  For instance, 1 bumber sticker, you are relatively sane with the occasional trip to crazy town.  5 bumper stickers and you think other people's works and sayings are your own, you have stalked a human at some point, and you generally annoy most people you deal with.  10 plus bumberstickers, you are bat shit crazy.  Don't give me the, "I have a bumber sticker to celebrate my student being a honor student."  BS, you have that sticker on there because you think that proves that you are good mom to all the other moms out there.  All it proves to me is that you cannot talk your kid out of putting something permanent on your ride.   Good luck with the tattoo conversation.

Office Advice

Do not call the hungry, pregnant office co worker the office garbage disposal.   This will be taken the wrong way.  I am not sure the right way to take that but it just came out of my mouth.   I am sure she will talk to me again.

Legit Taxi

I just saw an old Suburban that on the back windshield, spelled out with alphabet stickers, had, "This is a real Taxi" and a phone number.  I tried to get close enough to get a pic but of course I was behind someone that was at least 135 years old.  I would call this cab out as being really shady but he did capitalize "Taxi" so I am sure it is a safe, non-kidnapping/muder mobile.  Honestly, if you fall for this death chamber you belong in the Silence of the Lambs style pit you end up in.  Oh, and the driver had on a hat that had those old school mud flabs hanging off the back of it.